Book Backlog: Three Diverse Reads

For a host of reasons, I’ve not been doing as much personal writing in recent years. I won’t promise that’s going to change yet, but I’m going to make a start, at least, with short “reviews” of three very different books I’ve read in the last year: a chance spiritual read called Beautiful Outlaw by John Eldridge; Cannery Row, a great short novel by John Steinbeck; and Shantyboat, a non-fiction account of a married couple’s journey from Ohio to New Orleans in a homemade driftboat in the 1940s, by artist and writer Harlan Hubbard.

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‘He Makes Me Lie Down in Green Pastures’

Last weekend we laid my dad to rest. When it came to death, Dad was a practical man: He wasn’t religious himself, and he didn’t want us to spend a lot of money or effort on a funeral. Sorting through his preferences and our own beliefs wasn’t completely straightforward, but I believe Mom managed admirably.

In Dad’s final months, he had shared with her that Psalm 23 was a favorite passage that his Little Grandma used to read to him when he was little. We all prayed it over him, and for him, many times during the final weeks of his life. During the burial, the line that stuck out most to me was, “He makes me lie down in green pastures.”

I believe the Lord has shepherded Dad, and all of us, well these past months.

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The Dad-Roll and Other Defensive Maneuvers

I am not naturally graceful. As a boy, I cast a shadow like a keyhole—a melon head atop a stick-figure body, careening through the world in whatever direction my topmost orb led me. As a teen, I lived in a narrow trailer house with my folks and spent two miserable weeks after my dad’s foot surgery finding every possible way to pinball into his elevated leg and throbbing big toe.

Today I am much the same: I move effortlessly, like an October acorn pinging from roof to car to driveway. I still drift the way I’m leaning and collide with stationary objects, softly as a poolside preschooler wearing swim-fins.

And yet, somewhere on the outer ends of my Y-chromosome is coded an instinct for self-preservation, which (to date) has kept me physically intact and free of broken bones or stitches.

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Sound and Silence, or Surviving Spiritual Whiplash

On Thursday, I attended a day-long silent retreat with the rest of the staff from our Catholic church and school. Father Park opened the retreat with the Old Testament account of Elijah in the cave on Mount Sinai, waiting for the Lord to pass by:

And behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and broke in pieces the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice. And when Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave.

– 1 Kings 19:11-13 (RSVCE)

It was a scriptural reminder that God speaks to us in silence, but I didn’t need convincing. For the past several years I’ve tried to make an annual, three-day silent retreat to reconnect with the Lord and re-examine what He is doing in my life. I find great solace in the silence. I feel Him near, and if I work at quieting my head and heart, I hear that still, small voice.

Thursday was no exception. After the longest three months of my life, comprising…

  • the arrangement of in-home care and support for my dad and mom, respectively,
  • followed by Christmas with most of the kids and a trip to Italy to visit the rest in December;
  • Dad’s rapid decline and death in January;
  • three trips to Michigan and back (one flying; two driving);
  • a surgery for my bride;
  • and a mad scramble to keep up with work in between

…even a few hours of silence were, to me, like a soft, steady rain on parched earth. I could feel my heart expand to fill the hollow between my lungs. Slowly, tentatively at first, it stirred to life and began to beat again. I spent two fruitful hours in silent reflection. I prayed a rosary while picking my way through the ruins of the frozen lakefront outside the retreat center. I spent a restful half-hour before the Blessed Sacrament—so peaceful, in fact, that I fell into a deep and silent slumber.[1] When the priests intoned the Tantum Ergo, I suddenly and unexpectedly levitated.

At the end of the afternoon, Father asked us to share a little bit about our retreat experience. When the mic came to me, I said, “I lost my dad recently. It was good to spend a day with my Heavenly Father, and with our Mother in Heaven, while I try to care for my mother on earth. I like silence and try to make a silent retreat every year. I missed it this year, so even this short retreat was a blessing—now I get to take three middle-school girls to the Toby Mac concert!”

Nearly everyone laughed.

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Daryl Thorp, 1948-2024

REMUS, MICHIGAN—Husband, father, machinist, and mule driver, Daryl Thorp passed away on January 28, 2024, in the log house north of Remus with his wife and children around him.

Daryl lived on his own terms. He was born in the Thumb of Michigan in 1948, the youngest of the four living children of Duane and Mary (Hawley) Thorp. He lost his mom in 1953 and spent much of his formative years with his Little Grandma. Though he was never religious, he was a deeply moral man who, even late in life, said that in everything he did, he was trying not to let Little Grandma down.

Life wasn’t easy, and by the time he was a teenager, he was already making his own way as best he could. He was bright and mechanically gifted from an early age, but he had little love for school and would rather be working with his hands or hunting and fishing. He joined the Army after high school and was blessed to be stationed in Alaska. He said the biggest thing he learned from the Army was that he didn’t want to stay in the Army, so he had better figure things out. He told a buddy he was going home to marry the neighbor girl, and he did—though at that point they had never even been on a date.

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