Wednesday Witness: Checking the ‘Charity’ Box

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving already, and this Sunday, Advent kicks off. Christmas, it seems, is right around the corner, and the world is already in a rush.

It’s easy this time of year to get caught up in the holiday hustle and forget those around us who don’t have basic necessities, let alone comforts and niceties. It’s easy to mean well—to intend to give to charity, then run out time and money between now and New Year’s Eve and resolve to do better next time. And with so many gift trees, food drives, and red-kettle bell-ringers, it’s easy to give little something in passing and feel good that we “did our part.”

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Wednesday Witness: ‘You Can’t Save the World’

This column is part of a new, weekly series on what the Lord is doing in my heart, specifically encouraging me to simplify my own life in order practice the virtue of charity and the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. Come back each Wednesday to read the latest!

I’ve always been a big-hearted and emotional fellow. As a grade-schooler, I tried to intervene when those who were littler than me (not many) were being bullied. Invariably, I took a thumping myself. But I couldn’t help it: I hurt to see others hurt.

Whenever I got wound up about some injustice or suffering, real or imaginary, Dad would say, “You can’t save the world.”

What he taught me, instead, was how to stand up for myself, to treat others with respect, and to look out for my own—my family and close friends, those whom I could count on to help take care of me.

Dad was right: I can’t save the world. I can’t even save myself. Jesus is the sole Savior of the world, and—thanks be to God—it is accomplished (John 19:30).

But I don’t think our eternal salvation is what Dad meant.

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So What’s Your Plan?

In April, Jodi, Lily, and I spent a few days at St. Joseph Friary in Harlem with our second son Gabriel and the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal (CFRs). Gabe is discerning religious life, and the visit was meant to help us better understand the life of the friars, his formation during the past year, and the novitiate—a period of more intensive prayer, spiritual growth, and detachment—in the year ahead.

One of the unexpected joys of the long weekend was a visit from Father Columba Jordan, who was passing through New York on his way home to Ireland. Some of you may know Father Columba from his YouTube channel, Called to More: lean and gray-haired, close-clipped and bushy-bearded, an animated preacher who often delivers two homilies at once, providing a running comedic commentary on his profound reflections as they unfold. When he vested for Mass, I was excited. When he stepped forward to preach, I was thrilled.

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Blessed to Be Here

This post appeared as a column in the St. Michael Catholic Church bulletin for December 17, 2023.

A couple of weeks ago, we announced that our long-time youth minister, John O’Sullivan, has been hired to promote his brainchild (or rather, heartchild), Extreme Faith Camp (EFC), to parishes across the archdiocese. For those who don’t know, EFC is a wild, week-long Catholic summer camp that brings middle-schoolers to a deep encounter with the love of Jesus through fun and fellowship, small groups, prayer, and the sacraments.

Aside from making Mass a priority in our own lives, EFC was the single best thing Jodi and I did for our kids to engage them in the faith. Where else do tweens and teens enjoy a parent-free week with their friends and come back saying their favorite part was Adoration?

EFC is just one of the many reasons we are blessed to have been here in St. Michael for the past 20+ years. This parish’s strong support of marriage and family life is another, not to mention our beautiful church, our stellar parish school…the list goes on. We are a growing Catholic community because we have something for everyone—every person and family, at every stage.

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In Big and Small Ways, Hope Prevails

In recent months it has become apparent that I am a Worrier. Everyone has concerns, and sometimes those concerns get the better of us—but I actively pursue potential problems no matter how unlikely they may be, then chew and chew and chew on them.

I try to pass it off as a strength—foresight leads to preparation, which benefits my whole family. But the truth is less noble: Mostly, I just don’t want to appear late, ill-equipped, or foolish. Despite my best efforts, I am still trying to measure up. But to whose standard?

Jesus warns us against worry:

“So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’ All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom [of God] and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides.Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself. Sufficient for a day is its own evil.”

Matthew 6:31-34

The saints also warn us:

“Anxiety is the greatest evil that can befall a soul, except sin. God commands you to pray, but He forbids you to worry.”

St. Francis de Sales

“Let nothing perturb you, nothing frighten you. All things pass. God does not change. Patience achieves everything.”

St. Teresa of Avila

“Pray, hope, and do not worry.”

St. Padre Pio

I know this, and yet I persist in losing time and sleep, humor and hair, while fretting about the future and all its possibilities and challenges.

In the past several weeks, God has been working on this aspect of my conversion, especially in two areas of our marriage in which I am not only likely to worry but also to drive my bride nuts: travel and money.

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