It’s Gabe’s birthday, and he was feeling his oats, as they say — a little rambunctious; a little silly (as were the other kids, me included). So just before we begin, I look around and find Trevor, lying on his belly with his butt in the air and “aimed” directly at me, as it were.

“What is that!?” I roar, pointing at the pajama-clad rump.

Without missing a beat, Gabe says, “It’s a horrible crime against nature!”