fatherhood

LIFT Links: In Defense of Large Families and a Great Reflection for Parents

/ J. Thorp / Leave a comment

Blogger’s Note: In an effort to help friends find great Catholic content that supports them in the practice of their faith, periodically I’ll be sharing articles, websites, books, and other resources that may be of interest.

  • In Defense of Large Families. If you’ve had more than one or two children, you’ve probably already encountered someone asking incredulously, “Are all of them yours?” This article, “Your Mother Is Destroying the Earth,” authored by an Ivy League grad and sister of four, rebuts the idea that it’s any of their business at all — and links to some solid material about the dangers of declining birth rates. Worth a read, if only to laugh at the audacity of people who, on other issues, would demand the government stay out of private bedrooms and away from personal bodies.
  • They’re the King’s Kids. A fellow faith formation director from our previous parish, St. Michael in Remus, Michigan, shared this article from Fr. Barron’s Word on Fire blog: “Kreeft, Kids, and Cattle.” The post, by theology professor Tom Neal, is a great reminder that our job as parents is to “love the Hell out” of our kids and get them to Heaven. It’s easy to lose track of that in our day-to-day, hectic lives. Grades, sports, and college choices are important, but they don’t necessarily have eternal implications. “They’re the King’s kids. You’re His foster parents.”

LIFT Links: Resources for “Practicing” Catholics

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We are all practicing”Catholics – learning how to live our baptism, our vocation, and a sacramental life here on earth. In an effort to help friends find great Catholic content that supports them in their practice, periodically I’ll be sharing articles, websites, books, and other resources that may be of interest.

As the first installment of this series of posts, I want to share two resources – one for Catholic parents, and two specifically for Catholic men, who are arguably the linchpin in sustaining strong Catholic families. (Moms do so much, but it’s hard to do it alone!)

For Catholic parents:

  • Quick Read: Five Ways Parents Can Engage Children in the Faith. A parishioner and friend shared this great, brief article from Fr. Ed Broom on CatholicExchange.com, highlighting several easy things we can do as parents to lead our children to heaven. The tips on how to acknowledge the Real Presence of Christ in the Mass and the Eucharist are particularly important: remember, our kids can tell if we’re just going through the motions.

For Catholic men:

  • Manly Inspiration: The Catholic Gentleman. With solid articles, great photos, and timely topics like “The Thrill of the Chase: Prayers and a Patron for a Virtuous Hunt,” the website The Catholic Gentleman is a great place to go for a regular dose of manly inspiration for teens on up. If you are on Facebook, “like” The Catholic Gentleman for daily encouragement like the image at the right.
  • Strength In Numbers: Catholic Man Night. Catholic Man Night got its start right here in our neck of the woods in 2010, providing men with opportunities to come together to pray, eat, and get to know Jesus Christ. The website alone is full of great information, links, and resources, but the real opportunity for growth here is to attend an upcoming Catholic Man Night in person. We regularly host these events at St. Michael, so keep your eyes peeled for the next one and join us!

A New Calling

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Blogger’s Note: For those few of you who still follow this blog and don’t attend St. Michael Catholic Church, the article below was published at our pastor’s request as a self-introduction to the community in last weekend’s parish bulletin.

As of this week, I have been your new faith formation director for one month. The transition feels fresher than that, and I feel just as green, in many ways, as on the first day in the office. As I’ve said more than once, it’s like I’m a first-time parent again: like I have been entrusted with something precious and fragile and sent home with lots of advice and no clear idea of what to expect next.

Okay, it’s not as bad as all that. My wife Jodi and I have been parishioners here for 11 years now; two of our children (Trevor and Lily) have been born and baptized here, and our older kids (Brendan, Gabe, and Emma) have been altar servers and active in the youth group and other activities. Jodi and I were youth leaders at our previous parish—St. Michael’s in Remus, Michigan—and have been LIFT catechists, liturgical ministers, Natural Family Planning and God’s Plan For a Joy-Filled Marriage witnesses, and CRHP witnesses here. I also served on the Faith Formation Advisory Committee during the transition to LIFT, so I understand what we’re trying to accomplish and know how hard Carol and Kathy have worked over the years to build our core program.

Nevertheless, this is a big shift for me. I was baptized in the Faith but not raised in it, and I became a husband and father before I became a confirmed and practicing Catholic. Until last month, I had spent my entire professional career in journalism and communications. Jodi and I have talked for several years about the possibility of me working for the Church someday, but never imagined the call would come this soon. And it is a call. This past Monday’s reading from the prophet Hosea described the Lord leading His people to a desert place and speaking to their heart—and professionally, this past year was desolate and lonely, until former colleagues, friends, and family all began to urge me to pray and to think about what I was being called to do.

I prayed. I did my best to listen. And I’m here…now what?

We visited some of our former youth group “kids” in Michigan earlier this month, one of whom was recently featured in the Diocese of Grand Rapids magazine for her beautiful pro-life witness. In the article, Natalie jokes about how much she could accomplish if God would just give her a clear to-do list. Instead she—and we—are called into a relationship and an ongoing conversation with God, in which we get to know Him day by day, enabling us to better hear, understand, and respond to His desires for us.

That’s where I find myself now. We have a beautiful parish and community, faith-filled priests, strong core programs, devout and dedicated catechists, and a rookie faith-formation director who is on the job, but still praying and listening. We have a firm foundation and so much potential—and I look forward to hearing from and working with you as we continue to become a people living for Christ.

Nettles Or Nails?

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Some years back I wrote a brief personal essay on “the Jim-in-my-head.” The Jim-in-my-head is intellectually and physically fit, well-spoken and timely, gentlemanly even in revelry. He plays the upright bass and reads to his family. He hunts and fishes, writes and publishes, and still is home for dinner. He’s the idealized me, confident, unhesitating, and prudent.

Also, he does not exist.

I’ve known this all along, of course, but it hasn’t stopped me from chasing this phantom Jim, and stranger still, from feeling in recent years as though he’s slipping away. It should be no surprise, should it, that I am unable to catch a figment? But then, why these feelings of both failure and loss?

Last fall a couple of friends separately recommended to me the little book The Way, by St. Josemaria Escriva. I’ve been reading it little by little since then, waiting for the previous lesson to sink in before moving forward.

Fr. Escriva is no easy master, and his writings are loving, but direct and challenging, to the spiritually soft. One excerpt in particular has continued to influence my thinking on a daily basis:

“Many who would willingly let themselves be nailed to a Cross before the astonished gaze of a thousand onlookers cannot bear with a christian spirit the pinpricks of each day! Think, then, which is the more heroic.”  

— The Way, paragraph 204

I have said and written so many times that many people—many males, in particular—desire to be a part of something great and glorious, and our stories are filled with heroic deaths of good men. No man likes to imagine himself shrinking in the face of vice or violence, but perhaps it is easier to steel oneself for a bullet than to suffer a thousand paper cuts? Perhaps today’s nettles are heroic enough for now and serve not to wear us down, but to condition us for nails.